Sunday, April 9, 2017

On Being Super Human

Long before I was a romance writer, I was fascinated with what made people do things. It's why I was a Psychology major in college. I loved reading about what made people do things. Originally, I thought I'd like to study lands and cultures - what made a whole country or group of people do things. The career choices were limited (or appeared limited) back then. My love of travel and foreign lands spurred me on to thinking being an International Affairs major would get me where I wanted to be.

But no, I took a detour into Sociology, and then wound up finally in Psychology, bringing it all back to the individual. I was looking outside myself for reasons, and found them inside myself instead.

Now that I write romance, the study of character and calling is more important than just about anything else. That's why I enjoy writing about the Brotherhood, specifically the SEAL Brotherhood. These are men who put aside their fears (have them, but set them on the back burner) to do the things others cannot or will not do. I'm not naive to think that that makes them perfect. It makes them the ones who do not quit.

Navy SEALs go through the grueling BUD/S training not to find the strongest and most well qualified, but to find the ones who will not quit. People who don't understand this don't understand SEALs. Men who have passed the SEAL training look on those who have washed out or DOR (Drop On Request) in a different light than others do, perhaps. They don't see them as failures. They see them as men who discovered where their limits were. The real SEAL training makes them a SEAL. The BUD/S portion of it is just to see who is qualified TO START the training.

Everyone wants to be rich. Everyone wants to be handsome and beautiful. Everyone wants to be successful, to be well liked. To raise a family that leave their mark. Everyone wants to be a good friend, someone to be counted on. Not everyone is willing to pay the ultimate sacrifice to do so.

I listen to blogs and read about heroes every chance I get. One of the men I study I will not mention here, but he has given me so much wisdom about what it takes to be a true hero, a real man, a warrior of the first caliber. And although he speaks in terms of being a man, it also works for those who are not men, but those who wish to be a warrior at whatever they are passionate about. Writing? Love? Family? Being the best person I can be? Whatever the driving force inside of us, one thing is clear: it is the best part of all of us.

He defines Brotherhood in this way:  "Mutually held feelings of love, possessiveness, and respect that improves the current or future situation(s) of each member. True brotherhood is created by shared experience and defined by feelings. The experiences must be:  1) Difficult  2) Tied to ones survival."

We live in an age and time when "getting along" is the norm. When getting pampered is mistaken for care. When right thinking or silence is preferable to conflict. We are taught to avoid battle in all it's forms: battle of wills, battle of negotiation, taking risks, being unrelenting and unstoppable. Being unbeatable becomes fiction in such a world. Striving to go beyond our own limits something of fiction and fantasy and not real.

I write about the heroes who transcend all this, who are not perfect men by any stretch of the imagination, but who are blessed with the singleness of purpose: to serve and protect at all costs.

And to never quit.

Wonder what kind of a world we would have if everyone felt the same way.


8 comments:

  1. I can think of little sadder than choosing to not make a ripple. I spent so much of my life struggling to maintain the demanded smooth as glass life. The world changed when I chose to embrace the roller coaster ride that is true living. I've never been happier. Thanks for being one of those who helped me see how it's done.

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    1. Boy there are a lot of roller coaster rides, aren't there? I agree. The illusion of "smooth as glass" is just that, an illusion. Impossible to achieve. Just like "getting it all done" is impossible, but one is living, the other is surviving. Making ripples and having courage is getting that real juice out of the fruit. Thanks for the compliment, Judy, but you're the one who did it. And I bet you inspire others too. That's the nature of the beast. You can't keep it inside any longer...So glad you are walking the same pathway.

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  2. I'm still fascinated with what makes people do things. I'm certainly happy that you chose the path that you did. Lucky for all of us who believe in guts, glory, honor and true love.

    We will always find the answers inside ourselves. Inside, we are one with everything. Outside...well, there is much chaos to confuse us.

    xoxoxoxoxox,
    YP

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    1. So true, my prince. And I feel lucky to have stumbled upon this path. The more I study about heroes, the more I recognize the heroes in all of us, as we each triumph over things in our daily lives, especially things we hold most passionate.

      I do agree that the world doesn't have enough passion, yearning for true love, belief in that true love and happily ever after. It doesn't interfere with anything else we may believe in. But to believe in the spice, the juice of life, to go for what stirs us, is where true living starts and lives. I love that so many of us now can openly say that that's where we're all headed. It isn't easy sometimes, but it's worth it.

      Thanks for taking my hand, my handsome traveler!

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  3. Heroes came in all shape as sizes. Doing the right thing takes courage and integrity. As humans we don't always get it right. But, if you're done your best and achieved some of the aims and are able to try your best again. We can go to bed with a easer lighter heart

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    1. I agree 100%, Julie. Wise words from someone who is and was probably a wonderful wife and mother.

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  4. How interesting! I'm just hopping by...

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    1. Welcome here any time, Kara! Thanks for stopping by.

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